The Patriots

Here at the Patriot Press, it’s an almost-annual tradition to report on what Liberty believes should have been the Oscars winners. Here are our votes for the 2020 Oscars.


Sir Ian McKellan, a literal knight, decides to shed the old visage of a grizzled actor with a Shakespearean background for a fursuit and a new name: Gus The Theatre Cat. If this isn’t range, we don’t know what is. We cannot stress this enough: one of Britain’s most famous actors, knighted by the Queen of England, nominated for two Academy Awards, Gandalf himself, agreed to put on a CGI fursuit and act in Cats. He deserves a win for this absurd twist of fate alone.

We stan a good one-hour John Mulaney variety comedy special, and this time around John does not disappoint. From riveting musical numbers where Oscar-nominated actor Jake Gyllenhaal steps on broken glass and gets angry at a toilet for not flushing loud enough, to an in-depth and heart-wrenching conversation about how a child once saw famed American speaker Fran Leibwitz on the subway, The Sack Lunch Bunch takes a deep look at the American psyche. Move over, Martin Scorscese: this is cinema.

A movie no one asked for but everyone fell in love with because anything Pixar makes wins an Oscar. Will you cry? Of course you will: it’s the last Toy Story (until they make another one five years down the line)! Forky was…actually funny and honestly Woody and Bo Peep are a power couple. The movie feels fresh and familiar at the same time and shows Pixar at its best.

Notice that we didn’t cite her performance in one film specifically? That’s because it doesn’t matter. We are awarding Awkwafina “Best actress in a lead role” because she’s been perfect in every role she’s played. More importantly, she’s a #queen in real life.