First thing in the morning, you unlock your phone and your favorite app, Skyward Mobile Access, is already open. You gasp in shock when you see your AP Bio grade; it’s dropped from a 99 to a 98. That’s it. Your day is ruined. You will never be successful in life, never get into Harvard, never get a good job, never have any money, and die alone.
But somehow you have to keep going. Struggling to walk under the weight of failure, you trudge into your first period class. You chant your lucky number under your breath as you take your seat. “4.0…4.0…4.0.”
After acing your test, it’s time for lunch. But you are finding it unsatisfying to talk to the regular plebeians of Liberty. When your friend suggests that there are things more important than getting As, you know you cannot be friends anymore. From now on, you’ll watch Khan Academy videos in the library instead of socializing with such imperfect people. Friends are temporary. GPA is forever.
You leave the lunch table with a mission and spend the next half an hour trying to convince Murtz to raise your grade to a 103. Unfortunately, he won’t give in, solidifying your grade at 102.5. That’s it. You are 102.5% a failure.
What is joy? What is actual learning? Is anything more important than GPA? None of these questions enter your brain as you leave the room in tears, knowing that today you nearly attained perfection but fell instead into the abyss of mediocrity. From now on, you’ll stay up past 2 a.m. memorizing textbooks; that’s a certain recipe for success. Grades Obsessed Kid, you’re one of us.