#1

Swings

Coming in at first place is ol’ reliable – a classic swing. Everybody loves swings and they’re perfect for any occasion. You want to just sit around outside and get some fresh air? Swings. You want to burn a ton of energy? Swings. You want to self-isolate and just enjoy yourself? Swings. I have absolutely zero criticism of swings. I’ve even made my own swing to maximize comfortability and visual niceties and I have no regrets. If you don’t like swings–yes you do. You just don’t know it yet.

#2

Ziplines

Runner-up is the zipline. I’m not talking about the fancy ones that are 400 feet up in the mountains (even though I love those); I’m talking about the ones for children that aren’t even two feet off the ground. They may not look like the most exciting things in the world, but if you get the right footing and momentum, you can zoom with the wind in your hair.

#3

Slides

Slides are a hit or miss for me. If you’re wearing shorts, you’ll get stuck halfway through and fry the skin on your legs. Or you may violently hit your head. But if you’re wearing full length pants, it’s usually smooth-sailing. A really good slide is hard to come by, but when you find one, it’s magical. Personally, I find the ones that are just two metal bars with no center to be the best.

#4

Monkey bars

Coming in dead last are monkey bars, which may be a controversial pick, but hear me out. Monkey bars may be great for seven year olds who weigh sixty pounds, but for anyone else, they are less of a fun time and more of a core workout. If that’s your thing, by all means, go for it, but if I visit a playground, my intention is to play. Monkey bars aren’t the worst option out there – I’m looking at you, teeter-totter – but all I really like doing is sitting on top of them.