Ever since I was little, I’ve always been told that it’s healthy for children to talk to both or one of their parents whenever something was going on in their lives. And while it’s true that it is healthy to talk out your problems with your parents, I can next to guarantee that most teens don’t go to their parents for much advice.
To those that do, good on you. Please be proud of your magnificent honesty and strength. It is truly admirable.
As for the rest of us oh-so-classic teenagers, there are various reasons why we don’t wish to go to our parents. Maybe it’s because our values don’t correspond with our parents’, or maybe our parents are the problem. Perhaps you don’t have a good relationship, or have no relationship with your parents, and that’s what is stopping you.
I would highly suggest going to a trusted adult figure in your life, though. Maybe it’s a neighbor, a teacher, a coach, an instructor, a therapist, anyone.
Most people talk to their friends, and while their input is great, they’re going to be in a similar mindset to your own, which more often than not, just adds fuel to the fire that is your dilemma or issue.
For me, the go-to adult in my life has been my private cello teacher. While I don’t have to explicitly say that there’s something wrong, she’s been around me long enough, that she’ll take the initiative to stop my lesson and ask me what’s going on.
And she’ll listen if I want to talk. If I don’t, she’ll back off and maybe spoil me a bit by “accidentally” skipping my technical exercises, and moving directly onto my solo piece work.
What I appreciate most about her company is that when I talk to her about my problems, she hears my side of the story, expresses her sympathy, and brings in her point of view to the situation.
And as much as I want to say that I possess an adult point of view, I don’t. I’m still a teen. I don’t pay taxes, or have to compare car insurance rates from different companies, or have to put food on the table for a few kids. If I think I know this much at sixteen years of age, how much will I know when I’m at my cello instructor’s age of mid-30’s?
As annoying as it is to have adults tell us that we don’t know much about life, it’s the truth. This is why it’s important to have an adult role model in your life, who you can reach out to at any time.