Heading towards disaster

Daniel Flash, Backpage Editor

Something truly terrible is going to happen, and we must acknowledge it. I think we should all take a brief moment of silence to acknowledge the future generations of students that will have to learn about 2020 in their APUSH curriculum. As if the class isn’t already hard enough! 

For the first two and a half months of 2020, save the threat of World War III breaking out, everything seemed to be quite normal. Or so we thought. First, Meghan Markle and Prince Harry decided to leave the Royal Family. Like, when was that allowed?! This should have been our first clue that something terrible was coming. 

But there’s more. After that, Tom Brady and the New England Patriots didn’t make it to the Super Bowl—pretty unexpected considering they were on a three-year streak. This Patriots failure would be a great cause and effect example to use on an FRQ during the AP test. 

But the most unexpected event of 2020 was the Covid-19 pandemic. I’m sure that Darnell is already crafting a riveting lecture titled ‘How Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s decision to leave the Royal Family caused the Covid-19 pandemic of 2020.

 In the year 2030, there is going to be a task that is one hundred times harder than surviving this pandemic: learning the new AP US History curriculum. Once the new APUSH textbook comes out with eight new chapters on the year 2020 alone, Darnell’s three months of lectures on the topic will be exhausting. 

There are so many topics to be discussed: the Covid-19 pandemic, BLM protests, Trump vs. Biden showdown…the list is endless. There will simply be too many units to cover.

Just imagine the DBQs! Students will be pulling all nighters every night to stay even remotely caught up. CROs will be assigned daily instead of weekly to cover all the added content. It is not going to be fun—and just imagine the AP test! The multiple choice section will only be about 2020! Forget the past 500 years of American history because there is only one year you really need to worry about. 

And that is why we must take a moment of silence for the students of the year 2030. We all wish them luck.