Part Two: Of Adventurous Foods

March 2, 2019

“In pit orchestra, I started eating raw eggplants. I just had two and I started taking bites out of it every now and then. I was walking in the hallway after a performance and pass Tanner. I look him straight in the eye and take a huge bite and start chewing. It tasted like grass, except a little better.
“After the assembly where I wore Spartan armor, Dan Noble offered me a bite of his drumstick that he’d been eating. It only had a little bit of meat on the end. He asked if I wanted a bite and I said sure. I took it and crunched the bone. Tanner sees me doing this and said, “Uh, watch for bones, Jay.” I said “Okay” but there was shards of bones sticking out of my mouth.
“I made this catapult out of scissors in Kruzich’s class, and there was an apple stuck in the scissors that acted as a counterweight so I could propel things a few feet. I took the apple out—it was really mealy—and started stabbing it with the scissors. I put it on my desk. At this point, people are staring at me. So I slam my forehead down and the apple just spews outwards. There are a few chunks, but it’s mostly just mealy apple juice. I called it applesauce and started eating it. Kruzich asked what I did and I told her I was eating applesauce, and said, “I don’t know what the problem is.” And that was that.”

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