The Patriot Press

Hot or Not? of History

September 26, 2018


Filed under Backpage, The Artichoke

Hot: Martin Luther’s heretical bestseller The 95 Theses The Discovery of Coffee Europe finally letting go of its colonies The Invention of Fire Socrates inventing his patented Socratic Seminars ™ The Scientific Revolution Not: King Tut’s early death (RIP KT 1324 B.C.) ...

Banned Homecoming dance moves

September 26, 2018


Filed under Backpage, The Artichoke

Liberty Homecoming has a timeless tradition of tasteful dancing. But it wasn’t always this way. Here are the most vile, scummy dances from Liberty’s unregulated dancing era. “The Sweaty Sock” This classic dance move was a homecoming staple until Mr. Kennedy tried the move back in ‘99....

Liberty Football asserts American dominance

Armurica Greatlee, Artichoke Editor

September 26, 2018


Filed under Backpage, The Artichoke

It’s not often that barbarians come to challenge you in your national sport. But that’s exactly what happened on August 31, the Friday before school started. They came from the north. With Canada having also declined to pay for a wall on their border with the U.S., it’s unknown if they came...

The Artichoke

Alexandra Fordhart and Alex Hartford

September 26, 2018


Filed under Backpage, The Artichoke

We here at the Artichoke have your best interests in mind. So in order to serve our loyal patrons, we have compiled the most important (and completely true) news headlines of the last few months. Always remember to stay informed! July 3 - After being faced with questions, Jon Kinsley explains that $1...

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