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BP Profile: Always getting pranked kid


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It’s approximately four minutes and fifty-three seconds until the most dreadful day of the year: April Fool’s Day. You haven’t slept for the past week because you fear awakening to a world that only consists of atomic wedgies and plastic snakes. You think to yourself, in your “lucky” meditation room bedecked in four-leaf clovers, lucky horse shoes, rabbit’s feet and guarded by leprechaun lawn gnomes, what your supposed friends have in store for you this year, especially after you almost died from the whole whoopee cushion incident last year.
You have developed a strain in your neck from looking over your shoulder every five seconds to ensure your temporary safety. You even contemplate staying home for the day, but you just have this overwhelming feeling that they have bribed your parents to become double agents. Despite your fear, you decide to brave school, desperately avoiding contact with anybody whose grin is nine and three quarters degrees more curved than usual. As you sneakily walk around school like an FBI agent, you trip a wire and start to lose your mind.
Luckily, just before you accuse your friend of betrayal, you notice it was your shoelace and continue walking to class. Before you know it, the day is almost over and you quickly sprint back to your house completely forgetting your younger sibling you’re supposed to pick up, but nonetheless you’re set on going home even if it means permanently being the only child.
After getting in bed you casually check Facebook to see the most horrifying message ever. They’ve changed your clocks and April 1 is actually tomorrow.
Always getting pranked kid, you’re one of us.

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Forum for student expression since 1977
BP Profile: Always getting pranked kid